Nia Dark and Lovely, a Black Escort in London

I met a new client who freaked me out. It was not anything that he did. It was the way he looked. As I opened the door, he fit my image of what a proper thug would look like. I panicked and thought he would be aggressive.

I do not care what people look like, but in this instance, I have to say I was worried.

He turned out to be a rough diamond, who had a basket of tricks up his sleeve. It just goes to show you cannot judge some people by how they look.

What would you do?

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, clients, London

I did my weekly catch up on a messageboard at the weekend.

I came across a post where someone mentioned that a famous escort who he saw, told him that a client turned up at her day job, and made it obvious that he knew that she was an escort. She thought he was a shit for doing so.

The thought of this happening to me is unsettling.

I am aware that some of my clients have just as much to lose as I do. They are married, high powered professionals, who could not deal with the embarassment. If their wives found out, they would be taken to the cleaners. However, there is a group of men, who do not give a damn.

Reading that post on the messageboard, was a reminder as to why I do not give personal information to most of my clients. I have done, with some of my regulars, but they are in the minority. I know some escorts who tell all their clients their real names, and where they work, as they find it easier to deal with. Good luck to them.

Last year I had a booking with someone who works in the same field that I do, outside of this industry. If I had this information, before I saw him, I would not have taken the booking. I recognise that it is unlikely that a client would disclose his occupation to you, unless you have had lots of email contact,are on a dinner/lunch date or he feels he wants you to know.

The chances of me bumping into this man professionally are very high, and god knows what I will do, when that happens. I do not like to mix this life, with my other life, but it feels that the two may merge now. Something that I thought was impossible.

I have to confess, that I made some assumptions. I did not think that there was any possibility that men who worked in my profession could ever be clients. A classic case of having a false sense of security. Total wake up call!

*gets flame retardent coat, and runs for cover*

Have any of you been in a similar situation?

If so, when you bumped into the individual, did they breach your confidentiality?

How did you handle it?

He has no idea what I do outside of this industry, so will be shocked if and when we do meet.

Two more additions to my sidebar.

Chevalier, who is based in Texas, who writes about his encounters with escorts and the scene.


Not just another John is forty something, divorced, has seen escorts. He is in a relationship with an escort, and bares his soul in his blog.

Pay them both a visit.

Have a good week.

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, Chevalier, clients, London, Not just another John, security

I saw Jacques a few days ago.

I have decided not to see him again. He has a way of making me feel flustered before I get there, the constant phone calls asking where I am.I know it is the coke, but it is still annoying.

I got there, and he extended our time, which is the norm. I think he gets paranoid, if he is left alone when he is on drugs.

He had paid me upfront, but then wanted to call his dealer, and realised that he did not have enough cash on him. He asked me for some money back, and would get some more later.

You know where this is going. This guy is not short of cash. I know where he works, and he is a major player in his field.When I read about him in the papers, and how well he is doing in his field, I smile. However, he has issues. He begged and begged,in his usual style and said he would get some more cash, so I gave him back some of the money.

I know, I know, why would I take that risk when he was so high?

I have been seeing him for over a year, several times a month, and this has never happpened.

When my time was up, he gave me his ATM card, with his pin number and told me to go and withdraw the money, and come back and give him the card.

I was not comfortable doing this, and told him to get the money, which he would not do.

If I had taken his card and withdrawn the money,how was I to know that he would have any recollection of the events, when he woke up the next day?

So, I left, and have decided I will not see him again. He is not worth the hassle.

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, clients, London

I am puzzled and bewildered. I get emails asking me for unblurred photos.

What are these men thinking?

As all my photos on my site are blurred.

Why would I send unblurred photos to a total stranger?

I am curious, could someone try and help me understand what the people who email me are thinking?

Mr Swot tends to only book escorts who have unblurred photos. He told me he took a huge risk with me.

I wonder why?

I guess if you have had a number of experiences where the person you see disappoints, it is safer to see someone who has unblurred photos.

Most of my clients say they come to see me, because my photos are blurred.

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, clients, escorting, London, Photos, security

A friend had given Jacques(not his real name) my number. He had a thing for Black escorts. I got to his flat one evening, and he seemed to be a normal guy. Some good background music playing, and a little chit chat. I got to know him better over time.

The first alarm bell, was him trying to heat something up in a pipe. I am no drug user, and at the time I had no idea what he was doing. Duh! He wanted us to dance, which was cool with me, and then he would take my clothes off. The next thing was having a bath together, which became a regular thing. I usually have a shower before I see a client, but with Jacques, it was part of the booking. I am shaven, and on further bookings Jacques would ask whether he could shave me. I was not prepared to take the risk with his drug use, and really would not let any client do this.

I remember saying to Jacques, that I needed to go to the loo. His face lit up, and he asked me whether I would piss in his mouth. I was shocked, watersports is not up my street at all. As soon as he said it, I suddenly did not need to go to the loo. He begged and begged, but I just could not do it. This is not about my Catholic upbringing, it is more about being programmed to use a toilet bowl when I need to go to the loo, not someone's mouth. I know some people drink their own piss, because they feel it can cure ailments, but that is not something I do either.

Jacques, is very successful in his field. He is one of the guys who will get a very hefty bonus this year. What I saw was a vulnerable man, who was rebelling against his parents, who carried lots of guilt, with low self esteem.

I think the drugs helped him relax, but affected his performance. He could not get it up at all, and did not care. He got his pleasure out of pleasing me, the bookings were always lots of kissing, and him giving me oral. He is good at oral. I find most cokeheads, and other clients who use drugs, tend to be really good at oral. These guys tend to extend the booking time too,which means more money. However, it can be hard work. Jacques told me that his parents would be horrified if they knew what he was doing, and furthermore with a Black woman.

Do I really need to be listening to this?

Yes, I am paid to listen, and boy did I listen to Jacques. I think that was what he needed. Someone to listen and smile without judging him. The downside is, when it was time to go, he would get upset, and ask me to stay. He had paid for more time, but then wanted me to stay with him on my own time, as he said I was only going home to bed! The other thing is that whenever he called me, he expected me to fly to his flat, and would call me about six times, before I got there. I was never late, but I think there was something about him having no concept of time, with whatever drug he was taking.

I worry about him, and am also fascinated by how he can function so well in the outside world. I have read about him in the newspaper. Sadly each time I see him, his drug use has increased. He said he would like to see me as a friend, but does not feel that he has the guts to, without drugs.

Bookings with guys who take drugs are usually a piece of cake, and as I said more money, but also extremely draining for me. I think if I took drugs, then it would be okay, but I do not.

Must dash otherwise someone is going to get pissed off with me.

Have a good weekend!

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, clients, drugs, London

I slept with a priest yesterday. I had seen him a number of times, but he only let on that he was a priest yesterday, after he had come. This guy is up there with the DATY experts.

I wonder who taught him how to do it?

When he went down on me, I started to sing Hallelujah! He managed to do things at just the right pace. After he came, he disclosed that he was a priest. This freaked the hell out of me. I am a lapsed catholic, and can barely remember what I was taught in my catechism. It is strange, because every saturday, I was dragged off for spiritual direction, and had to learn all this stuff, off by heart. One thing I do remember is no sex with priests, no sex end of, unless you were married.

Well, where am I now?

He was not a catholic, so maybe that is not so bad. I know I am going down, but I just did not want to tip the scales, and sleeping with a priest may do that. In fact I believe most of us are going down, so see you all there :)

Had I known he was a priest before he saw me, would I have seen him?

I do not think so. I know this all sounds really hypocritical, but I just feel uncomfortable with it. Clearly if he had not mentioned it, I would not have had an issue with it. I guess my view on priests is, they are sacred.

Yeah, yeah, I also know about the priests who sexually abuse children, women and men, and I find that sick.

I have a client, a Trustafarian, who felt really guilty whenever he saw me. He was young, fit, and had lots of money to burn. Same routine, whenever I saw him. Catch up on what had been happening in our lives, debate about current events, and then down to action. This man worked my body out, and he had some serious moves. When it was all over, the guilt came out. He could not understand why I was doing this.

Why had I chosen escorting?

If things were so bad, why did I not stack shelves?

I was intelligent, and educated, and he felt awful dealing with what he had done to me. He said he felt sick. The thing is he kept on calling every week, without fail.

So, if it was so bad, why did he call?

I think with the Trustafarian, it was a ritual that we needed to go through each time we met.

Then there is Mr Swot who feels guilty because he knows why I do this, but would feel better if I was just doing it to buy Mulberry handbags, bless him.

It goes on and on and on and on.

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, clients, Guilt, London

I am amazed when I hear that some escorts get upset when their clients see other girls. In some cases, they have stopped seeing the client, as they were offended that he went elsewhere.I think this response is disproportionate.They feel that their clients are disloyal.

What is that about?

This is a classic case of blurring the boundaries.

Men like variety. I have no expectations that any of my clients should see me, and only me. If anything, I actively encourage the men who say they do not see anyone else, to try someone else.

The other thing that I have heard, is some escorts taking offence, as they discover that their clients have seen someone who they feel, is not in their league. The escort hierarchy raises its ugly head, yes it exists.

I accept it is bad manners when you see a client, and he spends the entire time he is with you, discussing all of his escort encounters. Yes, some men do this, and I have experienced it.

If I found out that any of my clients saw streetworkers , I would not be offended. I think I would be fascinated by the different choices that they make. I would not take it personally.

Some clients do not want to upset some of their regular escorts, and use different handles to write reviews, so that the escort will not pick up that they have seen someone else.

It can become so complex for some escorts who are checking the review sites, and feel that their clients are being disloyal, by the style that they have written reviews for other escorts. The comparison issue.

I just want to say to any women who may feel this way, try and chill out. The thing is, if you let it affect you, you will find yourself becoming frustrated a lot of the time. What a client does when he is not with me, is his business. If a regular stops seeing me, after a while, that is not a big issue. Clients will always come and go.

How can I ever expect to have ownership over a client?

The other side of it, is clients who are regulars who want to know how many clients I have seen in a week. This question is inappropriate. I feel that it would be appropriate, if the person asking the question was my pimp, or manager. As I am independent, it is not.

The question that usually follows this, is a client expressing discomfort around the fact that I see other clients.

Hellooooooooooooooooo!

If you want exclusivity, then arrangements can be made. Other than that, you know what the deal is from the start.

Life will be stressful, if you only are able to see things for what you would like them to be; rather than for what they are.

I am not suggesting that you cannot have these feelings. My thoughts are more along the lines of how people who feel this way, manage their anxiety/disappointment.

Labels: Black escort, Boundaries, escorting