Nia Dark and Lovely, a Black Escort in London

Regular clients tend to know more about me than non regulars. One of my regulars is aware of what I do outside escorting, and asked me to be a part of his business team. I was flattered, and shocked. He clearly thought that what I am doing at the moment, would work well, with the business he has set up.

I declined the request, but was tempted. The issues for me were again around boundaries. It is not something that I would feel comfortable with at all.If I applied to work for an organisation, and realised that a client was a member of the staff team, I would leave.

You come across so many different types of professionals as an escort. I have to admit that at times, I wish I could use the services of some of my clients, but I do not feel it is appropriate.

I have heard of an accountant who does the books of all the escorts he sees. I have seen an optician who offered to check my eyes, but again I refused.

I know that some escorts sometimes put messages on boards offering their time in exchange for certain services, ie plumber, interior design,gardening.

Have any of you been in a similar situation?

Labels: Black escort, clients, London, Regulars

Glengarry Leads comment, in my paying for it post raised a number of issues for me.

I can see where he is coming from. I have had some negative experiences with some regular clients, and am not prepared to leave payment till last. I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt until I am proven wrong.

I had two regular clients who intentionally short changed me, and who are now blacklisted. I think what some men do, is wait until you have developed a certain level of trust with them, and you are unlikely to believe that they would con you, and use this opportunity to do so.

As Jeanette Angell mentions in her book, and which I raise here a sure thing is not a sure thing until your money is in your pocket and you are out the door.

Mr Swot told me that whenever he pays upfront, the performance of the escort is poor, and when he leaves it till last he has a better experience. This is his experience, and is true for him.

I think what some clients need to bear in mind, is that you could be perceived as high risk if you do not pay upfront. I actually resent having to ask a client for payment. I rarely do, in fact in most cases, the envelope is handed to me, before the client sits down.

Why should I have to ask?

Okay, there are have been occasions when I have not been paid upfront and it has been okay. Sometimes the conversation has been so riveting, that I have forgotten.

However if I am not paid upfront, and leave it to the end, and the client pulls a fast one, who can I blame,other than myself?

I have read countless threads on messageboards of escorts being conned, and frankly I am not prepared to take that risk.

I have been bitten by regulars who I thought were okay. Unfortunately not every client is as honest as Glengarry Leads.

Have a good week.

Labels: Black escort, Jeannette Angell, Payment, Regulars

I have just opened my post and received my first two Christmas cards already!

I have a pretty good memory, but when I am stressed out, it does fail me. I had a client Mr Scandi, who I had seen before. I saw him once or twice a year, when he was in the UK, and each time I saw him, he did not realise that he had seen me before, until after the act.

I found this hilarious, as I do not look any different.A few pounds here and there, and a hairstyle change :).

I have a friend who has had a similar experience, but her client realised that he had seen her, after he left.

I read about clients on messageboards, who are suprised that escorts remember their names. I think if you are seeing lots of new clients, it is challenging to remember everybody, unless you keep records.

Some of my regulars call me up, and are surprised that I remember who they are.

Is it that difficult with regulars??????

Do you remember the names and faces of everyone you see?

Labels: Black escort, clients, Regulars

I sometimes feel that I would prefer all my clients to be regulars. They are loyal. Purely, from a psychological perspective, it is easier for me to deal with regulars. However, I find that occasionally the boundaries do get blurred. Guys sometimes want that bit more, and it is not possible. It becomes awkward as these are people that I have been seeing for a while, and I have to be quite sensitive as to how I spell out what is and is not likely to happen. I admit that over time, I lower my defenses which I feel is inevitable, but can be problematic.

I had two regulars last year, who tried to pull a fast one on me. I was stunned.

Should I have expected this?

They are on my blacklist.

I am aware that there are some regulars who if I met them in another context, I would spend time with. I think it can be a challenge to work within this framework, without being labelled as cold, a clock watcher or just in it for the money.

Trying to keep the relationship commercial is tricky. Some guys I meet feel that it is personal, and the thing is, people that I have personal relationships with do not pay me. The relationship with a client is intimate, two people relating to each other. At some point, someone may tend to see things for more than what they are.

I have had clients who helped me out with advice on certain things, and have refused payment. There has been no expectation that I pay them in kind.

I do give my regulars more leeway than non regulars.

I know that some escorts get round this problem by stating that they will only see regular clients for a limited number of times, which I think is a sensible policy.Escorts are entitled to set rules that fit, for them.

I had a conversation about this with a friend who is a male escort and he felt that there were two kinds of regulars.

Static regulars who know what they want, never change, are loyal and you want to keep forever; and who are accordingly very rare.

Escalating regulars who start out as a good thing but either end up wanting you to move in with them (so they can look after you) or who meet you at the door one day brandishing a riding crop and saying

"I thought we would do a bit of spanking! You do not mind if I come in your eyes after I have leathered you, do you?"

who are more common, but finite, and who someone you thought was a static may suddenly metamorphose into an escalating at any moment.

I can identify with my friend's view. Suddenly an expectation that I will provide something that is not on offer. A sudden need for me to take an A level exam when I have no interest in that whatsoever. A client once said to me

" But you do that with your boyfriend, so why not with me ?"

My response " I don't think so honey." I spared him the long spiel of how he could never be my boyfriend.

Bringing the conversation back into the here and now, remember why we are here, some clients find difficult to take on board.

I love my regulars but someone has to maintain a business framework, and deal with expectations (realistic or not) and implement the boundaries with kindness and respect.

Labels: Black escort, Escort Blacklist, escorting, London, Regulars