Wednesday, November 15, 2006
I want to make you come
This is something that some of my clients say. There are several ways in which it can be interpreted. One of which is, that they want to make sure that I have a good time.
I feel uncomfortable when it is something that is said, as soon as someone has sat down, because I feel the pressure is on. Yes, I know I can fake it, and we know that lots of escorts out there do. The difficulty for me, is that I cannot come on demand, it is just not the way that I function. Each time I come, there is no particular thing, that I can pinpoint to, that made it happen. It just happens.
Julia O' Connell Davidson raises this issue in her book,
Prostitution Power and Freedom
She says "When a client expresses a wish for the prostitutes they use to achieve genuine orgasm, it seems to me that this too reflects a desire truly to possess the woman, rather than simply contract for her "services". Because they (wrongly) imagine that, if a prostitute orgasmed, it would be attributable to their own sexual performance, to evoke a genuine sexual response in a prostitute woman is seen as proof of having penetrated beyond the professional "facade". It is a victory over the prostitute woman because she is imagined to have lost control."
Belle de Jour covers the issue in her book on Page 94. She says "Regarding orgasms at work I don't. I don't equate number of orgasms with the level of enjoyment of sex, nor good sex with the ability to produce an orgasm. Let's be honest, this is a customer service position, not a self-fulfilment odyssey. They're paying for their orgasm, not mine. Plenty of the men- more than you might think-never even come at all. They never imply it's a failure on my part. Sometimes they're just after human contact, a warm body, an erotic embrace."
So no orgasm for me does not mean that you are crap. It is not about me evaluating your performance, even though that is what you may want me to do.
I feel uncomfortable when it is something that is said, as soon as someone has sat down, because I feel the pressure is on. Yes, I know I can fake it, and we know that lots of escorts out there do. The difficulty for me, is that I cannot come on demand, it is just not the way that I function. Each time I come, there is no particular thing, that I can pinpoint to, that made it happen. It just happens.
Julia O' Connell Davidson raises this issue in her book,
Prostitution Power and Freedom
She says "When a client expresses a wish for the prostitutes they use to achieve genuine orgasm, it seems to me that this too reflects a desire truly to possess the woman, rather than simply contract for her "services". Because they (wrongly) imagine that, if a prostitute orgasmed, it would be attributable to their own sexual performance, to evoke a genuine sexual response in a prostitute woman is seen as proof of having penetrated beyond the professional "facade". It is a victory over the prostitute woman because she is imagined to have lost control."
Belle de Jour covers the issue in her book on Page 94. She says "Regarding orgasms at work I don't. I don't equate number of orgasms with the level of enjoyment of sex, nor good sex with the ability to produce an orgasm. Let's be honest, this is a customer service position, not a self-fulfilment odyssey. They're paying for their orgasm, not mine. Plenty of the men- more than you might think-never even come at all. They never imply it's a failure on my part. Sometimes they're just after human contact, a warm body, an erotic embrace."
So no orgasm for me does not mean that you are crap. It is not about me evaluating your performance, even though that is what you may want me to do.
Labels: Belle de Jour, Black escort, books, Escort orgasms, Julia O'Connell Davidson, London
