Friday, August 08, 2008

Escorts, timewasters,emails, and phonecalls

I have mentioned how I thin slice to avoid timewasters here. These days as I go through my emails, I can tell in a few seconds which emails are timewasters, and hit the delete button. Clearly some of these people have not read my website, as if they had they would realise I am not suitable for their requests.

In a few cases where I have decided to give some people a chance, they have proved to be timewasters. So I stick to my rules, and when certain keywords or phrases are used via email or on the phone, I switch off.

Here are some samples of timewaster emails that I have received.


Dear Nia,
Hi. Had a look at yr web site, you are gorgeus....., I am visiting london by 9th of Aug, can we be bed partners for few hours. I will be near Heathrow. And what services you provide. I prefer everything "WO" but what do you?. And of course yr charges for pleasure will be how much, its going to be hotel visit.
Hoping for a favourable response.


where u from how old r u how much


Hi Nia

I would like to make an appointment with you to come and see you for approximately 1-2 hours.I have a fantasy and I was hoping that you would be able to make it come true for me. I wish to be dominated by a beautiful young black lady just like yourself, as I believe black women are the most beautiful women in the world!Here are spome of the things I was hoping you do to me:Sit on my face Being told to lick your pussy Being told to lick your arsehole Have a dildo in my mouth so that you can pleasure yourself! Being told what to do for a couple of hours!! To be totally at your mercy!! Will you also do Watersports and Hardsports on my face?? I am aware that this is a specialist service I totally understand if you are not willing to provide this.I'm a 29 year old white guy who is looking for his life long fantasy to become true. Will you help me Nia??I look forward to hearing from you.


hi honey,

im 34 years gonna stay in london.i was hoping for some exitment when i was there. You see i have this fantasy about having sex with a beautiful woman like yourself dressed in nice skirt,black silk stockings and high heels. My fantasy is to have sex in some public place like at the airport or maybe at a toilet in a restaurant, or maybe some other exiting place.Would it be possible for you to help me out. Im willing to pay very well please

Subject:Outcall request

Hi Nia,

We are 2 professional guys in our late forties coming to the UK next month from Canada. Staying at a 4*hotel near Heathrow and are looking for alittle R&R with a sexy lady. Would be outcall for 4 hoursfrom 6PM but will provide food and refreshments. Even we can't go on all the time! No holes barred and DP an important part of the sensual experience for us.Spit-end roasting too and we like CIM. We love experienced gals and you look the part. We are experienced and sensual guys and will want to make it fun for you too.So are you available those days? Does the proposal sound interesting?We hope so..


Hi There

I am a submissive male with a fetish which i was hoping you could maybe help with.My dream is to have a dominant woman tie my arms behind my back, gag me, and then sit fullweight and fully clothed on my face (preferablyin pvc) and ignore me completely whilst she watches a movie. Then when the movie is finished just get up and leave me tied up and gagged inthe hotel room and go home.Is this something you would be happy doing, or is it a bit much? Iwould be happy to pay more than your standard fee if it is something you would consider?


Dra Nia, I am a huge fan of yours, I think you're beautiful and you have the most incredible body and although I'm yet to ever go with an escort, when I see your photos it really makes me want to pick up the phone! I think its incredibly sexy that you're an escort, I seriously do, a beautiful lady having that much sex, being desired by so many, guys queuing up to be with you and paying for your time.... there's something so erotic about it all. I don't know if you enjoy the job, I guess someday's are better than others, but if I was a girl I think it would be fun for the most part! How long do you think you'll stay doing escort work for, what are you plans when you stop? Whatever they are, I wish you well, I'm so tempted to call but I don't think I could go through with it, as much as your beauty tempts me, I wouldn't want to waste your time. I'd love to meet up outside of work to talk to you about your experiences at work, but I doubt that would be possible, but I'm fascinated about the stories you could tell. I'd also like to take your photo (not naked or weird!), just a regular portrait as I'm an artist and I think that I could capture some of the truth within you. If it was at all possible I would appreciate a bit of your time, nothing weird, just the opportunity to meet you and take your portrait. I find you fascinating, with my best wishes,

Peridot Ash has a post on clients who want freebies, and Bettina has a good post on how many times do clients try calling escorts before they give up.

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*sympathy* :)
Those are hilarious! Thanks for sharing.
Oh Nia,
I'll take all of them ( invluding the two hotties fom Canada) :) and raise you the guy who wants to eat my

Thank you for stopping by.

Anonymous,I am pleased you are amused. It gives you some idea of what comes through the mail. Thank you for stopping by.

Thank you for your comments. You can take them all, and I am very worried about you,pmsl.
Don't worry about me, just send donations instead. Any denomination will do apart from the Yen.

You will get a laugh from this post from an escort review website. I can't say I feel sorry for the dude who was dumb enough to send the e-mail's in the first place.

Serves him damn right, thank you for sending the link.
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